Monday, 22 November 2010

The Milkshakes of Bristol

Milkshake #1 - Strawberry Milkshake from YoYo

YoYo is a "gourmet hamburger bar" that Josh and Mark took me to after the Titus Andronicus gig. I had a rather delicious wild boar burger, but I could have had anything from kangaroo to springbok. I could even have had ostrich but I don't see any reason to make those buggers any angrier.

Titus Andronicus were fantastifabulous, as expected, but I had perhaps a little too much fun shouting along to them. I went up to Patrick "Beardy Vocalist" Stickles after the show and told him, as best I could, that my vocal chords [points at throat] were fucked [slicing motion] but that was AMAZING [thumbs up]! Josh had to order for me at YoYo because I pretty much couldn't talk after the gig, but their thick, fast-foody strawberry milkshake did go some way to soothing my corroded throat. So I'm grateful to them for that.

Josh spoke to Patrick too. He asked if he could get his hands on the setlist but had to make do with a guitar pick instead.

Interlude - His Milkshake Brings All the Girls to the Yard

We stayed the night at Rob's flat, Rob being a friend of Mark's who goes to uni in Bristol. He very kindly let me have his bed for the night; I think I was supposed to be sharing it with Josh but he seemed happy to kip on the floor. His days of sharing beds with men are all but over.

Milkshake #2 - Coconut Milkshake from AMT

I could have had a lie-in on Saturday morning. Herbie was driving Mark and Josh back home in the afternoon and there was a free space in her car with my name on it but no, I'd already paid £7 for the 9.54 train to Cardiff Central so up I got at some ungodly hour and trudged to Bristol Temple Meads in the rain.

My breakfast consisted of an apple from Tesco and a coconut milkshake from AMT, one of those train station coffee bars. It was a very nice milkshake but the purchase was kind of a dick move on my part; what with it being November and all, it was pretty cold out, and the milkshake was also pretty cold, and, well, it's just plain mathematics:

Pretty Cold2 = Real F'in Cold

On the train this time I was sat alongside a table of middle-aged women eating brioche and drinking some sort of orange drink from plastic wine glasses so that was all very civilised. I was reading the Kick Ass comic which is so violent it makes Kill Bill look like Dora The Explorer but still, very civilised indeed.

Epilogue - Hot Chocolate & Malibu

On Saturday night, Sarah bought me a bottle of Mailbu and, just for the sake of experiment, I got quietly drunk. The initial plan was to mix it with Pepsi, but Pepsi's so detestably foul that after one glass I just started doing shots. Sarah now now holds the honour of being the only person ever to see me drunk; the rest of you will just have to use your imaginations. Apparently I'm quite funny.

There's still about half a bottle of Malibu left, by the way. According to my mum it goes quite nicely with drinking chocolate so I will probably try that sometime soon. That suits me a lot better than shots.

Joel.

P.S. Keep an ear out for Angry Christmas, the new song that Josh and/or myself may or may not be working on.

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