Season Two

Hello and hi everyone. I've been in Scotland recently but as you may be fuzzily aware if you read this post, Cutlery has marched fearlessly into its second year. Which means, incidentally, that's we've been living in 6 Tewkesbury Place for a full 12 months now too.

So it won't be long until, once again, we all go back to uni. Pete and I will be starting the third years of our respective degrees, while Cliffey is entering his second (just like the blog!).

And while I'm sure that will give me plenty to talk about here, first of all I need to cover where I've been for the past nearly two weeks.

...Well, I've been in Scotland, like I said. The first night was spent at a Travelodge in Lancaster, and was complete with all the thrills that implies, followed by a jaunt up the M6 to our cottage in Clackmannanshire.

The nearest town was Dollar and we went there a couple of times to get fish and chips and ice cream. It was very quiet apart from an hour or so when all the high schoolers in the area simultaneously came out for lunch, at which point it was surprisingly busy.

Of course we visited many touristy destination points in Scotland, including:

The Wallace Monument in Stirling
Yes, Wallace as in Braveheart. My dad, brother and I climbed up the scary spiral staircase to see the view from the top but Sarah and my mum were too scared so they just went to the gift shop where Sarah bought this hat (that's not the best picture but it's a Highland Cow).

Loch Leven
Featuring the castle where Mary Queen of Scots was imprisoned as well as some grouses that you could feed (that's actually a better picture of the cow hat, look at this instead of that one above).

The Camera Obscura Museum in Edinburgh
We arrived in Edinburgh on the last day of the fringe festival and saw an escapologist street performer (debate still rages on as to whether he was Scottish or American). Afterwards we went to this museum that was a bit like Techniquest but mainly the optical illusion side of things. Their main thing was a camera obscura that afforded a view all over the city, but we probably had more fun with the photobooth that could make you look like a monkey.

Fopp in Glasgow and Edinburgh
Once I realised that these cities had three Fopps between them, my bank account was doomed.

Edinburgh Zoo
Highlights included the penguin parade (reminiscent, I think, of the Squirtle Squad) and the two Sun Bears who seemed to want to kill each other.

But it wasn't all outings 'n' daytrips, nosir; there was plenty of stuff to do in the cottage too. We had a games room, which provided the perfect opportunity for a table football tournament (it came down to me versus my dad, and I foolishly threw away a two-nil lead to eventually lose five-three). Also lovely were the horses living near us, which Sarah was rather taken with. We fed them grass.

Our last few days north of the border were spent with Sarah's grandparents, as well as various relatives, which was lovely. Especially the amount of food we were given. Mind you, I did get a little weary of the following conversation, which I went through with a great number of aunts and neighbours:

"So what do you do, Joel?"
"I'm just going into my third year at university."
"And what do you study?"
"Music."
"Oh, aye, and what do you hope to do with that when you finish?"
"...Teaching?"

Such were my floundering attempts to sound respectable. I'm back at the Atrium from the 19th of September, so I guess I'll have to start working it out then.

That was a nice way of bringing it full circle, wasn't it?

Joel.

P.S. I had resolved to try haggis while we were there but, alas, I did not. Although I did have a pizza with cactus on it.

A Telegram From Scotland

THANKS CLIFFEY FOR SPECIAL ANNIVERSARY UPDATE STOP "CAT-STAMPING HANGOVER" WILL HENCEFORTH ENTER MY EVERYDAY USAGE STOP CURRENTLY STAYING WITH SARAH'S GRANDPARENTS STOP SARAH'S GRANDPA SAYS FOOTBALLERS THESE DAYS ARE "A BUNCH OF DOOLIES" STOP GOT THE TRAIN TO AYR TODAY AND MET SARAH'S AUNTY FOR LUNCH STOP I BOUGHT AN EDITORS TAB BOOK FROM WATERSTONE'S STOP STAY IN COTTAGE NEAR DOLLAR WAS LOVELY STOP ENGAGED IN MANY ACTIVITIES FROM ZOO VISITS TO PING-PONG TOURNAMENTS STOP WILL GO INTO MORE DETAIL UPON RETURNING ON TUESDAY STOP LOVE JOEL STOP

Yorkshire & Merseyside

Apologies for the lack of updates over the past week but last Sunday I was taken away from my cosy Cardiff comfort and driven Oop North to attend my cousin Fran's wedding.

Not that I'm complaining. Upon our arrival in Wakefield we were greeted by a rather delicious buffet, featuring ham, tuna pasta bake, salad, rolls, profiteroles, pavlova, and many other delicious treats.

And the hotel we were staying in - and indeed where the ceremony was being conducted the following day -wasn't too shabby either, especially since, as far as I was concerned, it was all expenses paid.

The first night was spent in bed watching Brassed Off on Film4. I received a text or two from my elder cousin Jonathan trying to coax me down to the hotel bar but this was roundly ignored.

The following morning my dad took me into Halifax to have a look 'round town. There wasn't much, although we did stumble upon the Halifax Piece Hall, the world's oldest remaining cloth hall and, coincidentally, the setting for one particular scene from Brassed Off .


The wedding, then. It was lovely (even given the slightly cheesy choices of music - Bryan Adams anyone?) and they had a very nice day for it. After nigh-on two hours (!) of wedding photography it was just about time to eat, and boy did I - I had the lasagne and the curry, followed by half of someone else's curry and some sticky toffee pudding. And yet even with all that food inside me, I still managed to get up and do a song or two with Jonathan's band. I was a bit out of practice on the drums, and I went into Mustang Sally on my horn in the wrong key (C# instead of C#m, what a fool!), but I'm pretty sure I managed not to ruin the wedding.


For Leg 2 of our trip we headed to Liverpool to visit my grandparents. Usually we would have stayed with them but this time we thought we'd mix it up a bit and stay in a flat in Toxtet, which, as Wikipedia puts it, "continues to suffer from poverty and urban degradation" as well as being "blighted" by "civil unrest" and "vehicle crime".


The flat was lovely. I was on an airbed in the living room, which sounds like I was slumming it but actually worked in my favour because I could watch American Pie and Burn After Reading from under my duvet. 


We visited the many charity shops of both Widnes and Liverpool, and I picked up a couple of CDs for cheapz (Lene Marlin for £1 anyone?), but eventually was glad to come home.


Which is where I am now. Much has passed since I got back - parties, hoagies, Easter - but I've got a work day booked with Cliffey today (having decided it was about time I hit the essays) so I'd best get cracking on that.


Joel.