Neither Istanbul (Nor Constantinople)

So Cliffey is updating his blog once more, and I'm damned if I'm going to update less than him - I don't see why should he get the proverbial drop on me just because he actually has something worth writing about. So you can either read about his tedious adventures in Eastern Europe, or you can come here and read about how I spent most of my day on Cracked.com (or I guess you could do both).

Today was my last contracted day at Next, and while I was in the dark as to whether they were intending to keep me on or not, I decided (admittedly after a lot of discussion and convincing from Sarah) to force the issue this morning and call it a day. So I worked one last shift, and informed my manager that my work there was done*. I think they had intended to keep me 'til Christmas but frankly I only wanted a summer job anyway.

Besides, I have bigger fish to fry because as of tomorrow, my #1 priority is research for my third year dissertation. This 10,000 word behemoth is worth about 25% of my overall grade and as yet I'm not even sure what I'm going to be writing about. So, um, any suggestions?

In other news: I have a mouth ulcer, except on my tonsils. Experts have characterised the situation as "pretty fuckin' gay". 

Joel.

*Although technically I didn't finish putting that last rail of clothes out before I left. Whoops!

Glastonbury Weekend

FRIDAY


As I ran from the stock room at 11am, taking the stairs three at a time, my thoughts turned to the long weekend that stretched ahead of me. Some people would be enjoying U2 tonight, but I was more exciting at the prospect of spending the night in Gem's room.

Except it was now my room. Gem had hastily and unexpectedly moved out on Thursday morning, and Sarah and I were quick to capitalise on this and increase our living space by about 150%. We had planned just to gradually start moving our stuff in, but of course we couldn't resist and ended up going all-out. I spent Thursday night in the master bedroom, surrounded by my wonderful possessions (mandolin, iPod dock, cuddly toys, etc.)

So anyway, after finishing work at Next on Friday I headed to Sturff, and after Sturff we went to TGI Friday's. I had recently finished stomping Tom in our one-on-one Fantasy Football league (I have Carlos Tevez to thank for that, mostly - perhaps I should send him an email) and, as we had agreed, he now had to buy me a meal. I had a lovely, expensive steak, and everyone had a great time. Except perhaps for Cliffey, who discovered that some girl he had a past with and now could barely bring himself to speak to was on the payroll at TGI's and happened to have a shift that evening.

Oh well. Later on, we kicked back with a head-shaving session*, a midnight visit to Tesco, and a great big washing-up session. Operation Polaris produced great results, but such things do not last in a student house, even if there are only three people officially living there now.

SATURDAY


Colorama are a local-ish band who sound a bit like the Super Furry Animals and whose new album I picked up from Spillers on Valentine's Day, more or less on a whim after listening to bits of it on their CD listening post. Today, they were scheduled to play a free set at The Old Library as part of Spillers 'Saturday Sessions' thing.

I was mildly excited, and while Sarah had to be in Next that afternoon, I had convinced Cliffey to check it out with me...that is, until it transpired that Colorama had traded the bustle of Saturday afternoon in Central Cardiff for the rather more bustling bustle of Saturday afternoon at the Glastonbury festival. Typical.

Their slot at The Old Library was to be filled by a band called Houdini Dax, to whom I feel I owe a little publicity because I know two of them personally - David and Jack are both on the pop music course - and yet decided, not for the first time, that I couldn't be bothered to go and watch. So click on this link, watch the videos, buy their album, send them naked photos, and generally do whatever it takes to bail me out, karmically speaking.

Still, I would not let the whole day slide by without taking in a little live music. So while thousands of people were enjoying Coldplay and wondering who that psychy Welsh band from earlier were, Sarah and I were listening to Mr. John Grant, for Czars frontman and the brain behind Mojo's album of 2010.

And, in spite of a few technical problems**, his set was fantastic. Most of his songs were backed by nothing more than a baby grand piano and a synthesiser, and The Gate made a pretty cool venue for it all, being more of a theatre than a club or concert hall.

The support act, Daughter, were good too. I got their EP and had it signed, although sadly the cardboard sleeve did get slightly bent in Sarah's rucksack. Oh well.

SUNDAY


Tom stayed over on Saturday night, and in the morning I was told that while I was falling asleep halfway through Megamind***, he and Cliffey had popped to the Kismet for a late-night curry. And guess who was there, chomping on poppadoms after another hard shift at TGI's?

Anywho, once we had all woken up and gotten dressed, the four of us (Sarah, Tom, Cliffey and myself) went into town to find costumes for our upcoming Pokémon party. It was a scorchingly hot day, and after stickly circumnavigating the city centre for an hour or so, we retired to Varsity for some food and a few cold drinks.

Which was lovely apart from the bit where I ordered some sort of complicated mocktail and the lady on the counter had to go and see if they had the necessary ingredients. Whilst awaiting her return, I thought it would be a great idea to perch myself on the bar - literally sit on the bar - and in doing so I knocked the Chip & PIN machine onto the floor, with surprising velocity. Imagine the launcher in a pinball machine, and replace the ball with maybe £25 per month of hi-tech gadgetry, and the launcher bit with my fat fuckin' ass.

I was roundly ridiculed, but hey, the virgin colada was nice.

And so, as several thousand people were realising that Kelly and Michelle would not, in fact, be making an appearance, Sarah and I rounded off the weekend by watching Catch Me If You Can, which we both agreed was awesome.

And now it's Monday, and Sarah's in work, and I'm sweating a lot and typing this blog and tomorrow morning I have work too.

Oh well. At least we know who our new housemate will be. More on that tomorrow.

Joel.

* Not my head. Meic's and Cliffey's.

** At the start of one song, he started singing into a second, thus far unused, microphone, which added a very distant-sounding effect to his voice. Which I thought was cool until he stopped and made an annoyed face, at which point I realised that the mic wasn't turned on.

*** Sarah had to fill me in the following morning. I won't spoil for you, but it all sounds very exciting. And for once I managed to guess an important plot point.

June 1st

Today is the first of June, which means several things:

1. It's the first day of summer! Although the weather outside doesn't quite see it that way.
2. Thing #1 doesn't apply to any readers in the southern hemisphere, of course. For them, June is pretty much the equivalent of December, so I guess that today is also the first day of Advent. Pretty crazy, I know.
3. Speaking of the southern hemisphere, today is Samoan Independence Day. Samoans the world over (although admittedly the proceedings are probably most concentrated in Samoa) are celebrating their mother land's independence from those notorious dictators, New Zealand (boooo!).
4. May, a month in which I updated this blog an astoundingly poor 4 times - joint lowest with December, but even December had that huge entry with the 69 songs - is officially over, so for what feels like the umpteenth time I'm resolving to start writing here every day. Bet you're all really excited, huh?

There were several other reasons today was going to be a big day, including Cliffey getting Xander back from the garage and Gem moving out and Sarah and I moving into her ginormous master bedroom. However, Cliffey has not heard from the garage and I've got a feeling that Gem moves out on the first of July, not June, so it's looking like a fairly quiet day from our point of view.

Yesterday, by contrast, actually was pretty busy. I started work in the stockroom at Next, and did so adequately that those in charge saw fit to give me two extra shifts next week (that's a good thing...probably). Sarah, who started on Monday, is also doing well, and tomorrow she will be working a full eight-hour shift. 

Pundits have pretty much unanimously predicted an achy-legged Friday at Tewkesbury Place.

We also went to see We Are Scientists last night, and they were awesome, if somewhat pre-occupied with the fact that we'd just had a bank holiday weekend.

I'd barely noticed, although now I think about it I did spend the Monday eating zebra, snails, impala, and all manner of other things at Mark's birthday barbecue. 

So I guess I did celebrate it a bit. Happy Independence Day Samoa.

Joel.

The Next Bit

To give closure to the last entry, however long ago it may have been: Sarah and I both got jobs at Next. I considered using this update to give everyone an amusing insight into Next's inner sanctum, complete with lots of sarcastic japes at the expense of their motivational notices and such, but frankly I feel that this would be churlish. Mostly I'm just grateful to them for having the blind faith to offer me a contract.

So Sarah will now be working in the Childrenswear department on Monday and Tuesday afternoons, whereas I will be in the stockroom on Tuesday mornings, 7-11.

That means some early mornings, but it might be quite nice walking into town at 6.30am, headphones on, seeing what, if anything, goes on at that hour.

Induction was yesterday. We filled in some forms, got the grand tour, and were shown some wonderful health and safety videos, which featured the cream of those actors and actresses who got a B for their GCSE practical but then decided to take a more science-y route for their A-levels.

My favourite part was in the bit about fire safety. The video was explaining that fire needs three things: oxygen, heat, and fuel. Of course, you needn't have taken a more science-y route for your A-levels to know that, but far more patronising was the sobering reminder that OXYGEN IS EVERYWHERE. Scary stuff.

In the evening a bunch of us went to Metros, but that's probably better left to word of mouth.

Joel.

The Great Job Hunt

Sometimes there's just no excuse. A week or two ago I could have told you that I wasn't updating the blog right now because I have a lot of uni work to get through and I can't waste time on such frivolity. But it's been ten days since I last posted anything, and for the majority of that time I've officially had Nothing Better To Do.

That's right, I've finished my second year of university. All the essays and recordings and whatever that I thought I'd never muster up the will to complete have failed to defeat me, although believe me I've found other reasons to worry. The main one is that this time next year I'll have FINISHED UNIVERSITY and will have to FIND A CAREER.

Which is weird for me because I still feel like I should be rehearsing for my GCSE drama practical. 

Anyway, back in the present day it's been decided that I should take some kind of part-time job to fund my various vices over the summer. This is pretty much what I did last year, except hopefully this time I won't get the sack after three weeks because I can't paint well enough to be a cleaner (yep, still bitter). So I've got a group interview at Next on Saturday, after which I'll hopefully be employed as some sort of stockroom dude. 

Sarah has also applied for a job there, although she'll be a shop assistant which means that she has to deal with customers. I do not envy her. Also, her interview is today so everybody think good thoughts between the hours of 2 and 3.

So there we are. I understand some of you have exams to revise for so I'll let you get back to that now.

Losers.

Joel.