Wednesday, 16 March 2011

Tonight's Predictions

Things I Think Will Happen Tonight:

1) We are expecting the arrival of one Andy Wright, and some assortment of us will proceed to the cinema to watch The Adjustment Bureau on this Orange Wednesday. There was some concern about finding a sixth person to make up three pairs; however, after Cliffey is killed in a Tom-based golfing accident, this need will be removed and Pete will be free to do what he wants.

2) Yesterday, Cliffey and I conducted a fridge-purge. Our harvest included at least five half-full bottles of gone-off milk, a few drops of which I spilled on myself while pouring the now cheese-like substance away. On our way to the cinema, I will begin to mutate as a result of exposure to this renegade strain of milk, and I will murder anyone who happens to be in the car.

3) If Matt Damon gets caught up in a thrilling conspiracy and none of us make it to the cinema to witness it, does he make a sound?

4) Later tonight, Pete, concerned after our failure to return home, will report our disappearance to missing persons. They will be uncaring, as most police are; as a result, Pete will launch a one-man mission to get to the bottom of the situation and bring whoever is responsible to justice.

5) Pete's mission will abort just over an hour later when he finds traces of the mutated milk and joins me on my own mission to kill all humans.

Joel.

No comments:

Post a Comment